Mechanical flowers and pies delivered by cannon: Arsenal's redeveloped stadium according to wild AI prediction
We asked AI to imagine what Arsenal’s Emirates stadium might look like after its proposed redevelopment - with bizarre results.
It’s been 20 years since Arsenal moved into the Emirates – but now plans are being drawn up to redevelop and expand the famous ground with the club apparently no longer content to play second fiddle to neighbours Tottenham Hotspur in the stadium stakes.
According to The Daily Telegraph, the Gunners are considering a “major expansion” of the stadium which could cost £500m and see them play their home matches at Wembley while work is completed, work that would expand their ground’s capacity from 60,700 to “beyond 70,000” while turning the ground into a “digital first” experience for the fans that flood through the gates.
As yet, no designs have been unveiled and we have no idea whether the work would not only expand but also revamp the stadium. Will Arsenal take the opportunity to spruce the Emirates up and change the look and feel of the place, or will this simply be an exercise in stacking some new seats up on top of the ones that are already there?
We don’t know, of course, but we can speculate – so we decided to experiment with the tool of choice for all people who lack fundamental imagination or creative talent (or people who just want to get to the pub faster, like us) and ask AI to come up with a new design for the rebuilt Emirates. And the results just made us want that pint even more than we already did.
Mechanical flowers and digital displays in Arsenal’s newly redeveloped stadium?
For the most part, the generative AI model that we used kept things pretty simple. The extra 10,000 or so seats would be integrated into the existing design with the glass façade and the bowl-like structure retained. But the ground would still be dragged into the digital age one way or another.
The exterior of the ground will now, apparently, be adorned with “a vibrant digital wraparound screen” which will presumably be largely used to advertise things but which will also show us scenes from Arsenal’s history, in case we wanted to check out a digital recreation of Hebert Chapman inventing the W-M formation in the 1930s. Which, by the way, is the AI’s example. We’d probably have gone with Thierry Henry’s goal against Blackburn ourselves, but clearly pseudo-sentient computer algorithms are natural tactics geeks.
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That’s not all, though. To bring a bit of brightness to the whole affair, Arsenal will now add the ‘Clock End Clockwork Garden’ which will consist of a bed of mechanical red and white flowers which “pay homage to the historic Clock End stand” from Highbury.
The attempt at a visual representation of this concept, which you can see above, is more tacky than transformative, admittedly, but it would certainly be something rather different. Not that we imagine any modern Premier League team allotting valuable retail space outside their stadium to a decorative garden, of course. They just don’t bring in the money.
Fancy getting your food shot at you by a cannon?
Of course, there will also be some upgrades inside the stadium, and here’s where things get really strange. Unless you’ve thought that what the fan experience is really lacking is the opportunity to have your half-time pie fired towards you out of a cannon.
First up, supporters will no longer have to queue for 20 minutes to get a bite to eat during the 15-minute break but will now be able to order refreshments to their seat using a touchscreen pad. Sounds great. But the means of delivery is a little unusual.
“Whirling, steampunk-inspired concession stands shaped like oversized cannons ‘fire’ orders via drone-delivered trays with whimsical animations of gunfire as they launch popcorn or pies.”
First of all… popcorn? At a football match? To be fair, Madonna was spotted munching said snack at Chelsea’s recent win over Liverpool. That oddity aside, we do wonder just how terrifying it would be to have your meal launched out of a massive cannon, and whether it’s really cost-effective to have every last chicken tikka pie sent over via drone. Besides, it won’t half be irritating when your view of the goal is obscured by a drone dipping in front of your face as it brings your neighbour a packet of Skittles. And think of the noise. And the potential lawsuits, as the inevitable third-degree gravy burns mount up.
In short, what we’ve learned from this short exercise is that what generative AI lacks in reasons to be glad it exists, it makes up for in the capacity to come up with terrible ideas. We think traditional architects’ jobs are probably safe for now. Anyway, at least we can finally get that drink in, hopefully not delivered to us via drone.